Oh boy as I am sitting at my desk I thought of something kinda’ cool. This may sound stupid but let me see if I can explain. For many years I operated as a monster gangster and white pride guy. Well I was not brought up in that lifestyle. It was something I became, out of a need for survival in prison and on the street. But before all this garbage that I was in I did have relationships - very good ones with folks who where Muslim and Chinese and other ethnic backgrounds.
It was a Chinese family that rescued me and gave me a shot at a career and a life. For many years they stuck by me and taught me to be a better person but then I went sideways. There were two Muslim brothers who treated me as their very own brother again for many years. And even though I screwed up often I knew they cared for me. I share all this to say that for all those years that I carried out my campaign of hate and misery I lost my respect for the very people who helped me in life.
I was thinking back tonight on stories my old boss told me about how his father came here with nothing and started a life and worked hard and I thought about other people I knew who had similar stories about coming to the country with 20 dollars or less and how they built a life.
Now I, of course, respect them very much and show love. But I got to thinking how nine years ago I came to Ontario with just a shirt and pants on. Nothing else did I own in this world—not a single thing. In the first few years I worked hard to be sure I was mentally stable. During this time I was mostly supported by middle eastern and Assyrian people—ironically, the very people I hated most were saving me again.
Anyway, now after nine years, I sit and consider how I have found my place and peace in this world. I sit in a decent home. I have amazing beautiful friends. And everything I have I have worked for and has been a blessing from God. Now not only do I respect those I showed hate to, but I understand their stories much better because now I have experienced fully what they must have felt starting over in life with nothing but the stuff you have on your backside, and being without friends.
Maybe this is why they helped me because they knew the stories of their very own families. I will never forget those who took care of me when I could not take care of myself. Michael Bull Roberts will always be a friend to everybody in and from any ethnic background and you can consider me a knight who will stand in front of you to protect you from anybody who would want to take your life.
I thank the Lord from where all lessons and love comes from!
I remember during my studies how America once supported the Hitler ideas an how Ford himself supported Hitler with great amounts of cash as well as other several American companies and how Ford profited greatly from the war machine providing engines for the enemy. I remember reading, when the war started, they shut down all the Hitler youth camps across America because suddenly it was oh shoot, we are at war with them now.
After several years of study, I sit and watch the news today and I watch as history repeats itself. Across America huge pockets of Americans support the Hitler ideology. I am not trying to tear down America I know many wonderful Americans and it is a fabulous country. But I am attacking the ideas of some. I had followed those same ideas for several years and finally I learned the truth by educating myself.
I watch on the world stage as I see Hitler’s ideas resurfacing across Germany as well as America - exactly the same as before minus Hitler himself. It is such a sick twisted ideology and how soon people forget the death of millions of people. It was humanity’s absolute shamefully worst era. And here we are repeating the same mistakes again as we remove teachings from the schools and we start forgetting history or ignoring as some Europeans do, that it even happened.
Again, I love Europe. I speak only of a pocket of those who remain ignorant. Our world leaders need to start seeing the humanity in the world rather than the power and flexing of military might. When a country like America flirts with the idea that they say they are the most powerful country in the world, well at that point of talk they are opening themselves to be challenged by other world leaders because they are not the most powerful country in the world. Most all of us on a human level want peace and restoration. No one wants to die. We want to raise our families in peace but when powers that be play politics they play with lives and no matter if we are black white or whatever race, we are human and we end up the tragedy or victim of politics. All lives matter. We all will defend our freedom and country but at what cost? So that leaders have more oil or land or power? It’s a lonely place. I know. Hate, as well, is a lonely place. I had both power and wealth in my lifetime and it only brought misery. My hate festered until I destroyed myself as well as many others. It is my prayer that dear Lord, please let us open our eyes and hearts to what is happening on the world stage. Please, Lord, open the eyes of our leaders to see the humanity and the destruction they are causing by making decisions to gain power and wealth over life and freedom.
War happens when we struggle with ourselves and we feel we need power and other motivations for self gain. We need, I pray, to be real warriors and stand up for peace and stand up for solid leadership. And hoping the main goal of leaders is not self - putting their own ideas first, but what is best for the people.
Standing to fight leaders like North Korea’s Kim Jong-un and others must happen but the country itself needs to be educated to keep from this kind of dictatorship in the future. I am aware this is a far cry and humanity will always fight itself but my prayer is, as I said, that leaders open their eyes and seek the good for humanity over self gain. I pray they open their eyes and see how history is repeating itself.
I pray that the world opens its eyes to see it is not a black or white or any race thing it is a human thing and all lives matter period. mbr
I just watched a movie – THE BIRTH OF A NATION—and now I feel sick.
As I think back to my racist past, watching this movie only reminds me how much black folks suffered years ago and how wrong it was.
Now, even the idea of humans being sold turns my guts. It’s a sad reality that people still profit from human trafficking.
Without the Lord, solid Biblical teachings and education, the atrocities of our past will continue.
The ideology that some come up with, like Hitler, Isis and other groups throughout history, cannot be destroyed by bombs or war or more violence. An ideology is just that—an idea that grows. You may bomb the results of the idea in one place but that will spring up as the same ideology in another place.
There are still skin heads and Hitler loyalists even today after many decades. Without proper education and good sound moral teachings in the schools, history will, without question, repeat itself and we as a society will continue to destroy one another.
Today history lessons in schools are slowly removing the past of WW1 and WW2 as if they never happened. Instead only current wars are being taught. Our heroes of the world wars are almost all dead and many are being forgotten. I, for one, refuse to let that happen and I always will honor the veterans for what they did for us.
When I educated myself, and discovered the truth about the sick ideology that I had fed into for so many years, I was in shock, disturbed and devastated that I had any part in supporting those ideas. I can’t turn back the clock, but I can do my best to undo some of the wrongs.
We need to educate our kids about all aspects of history even if our schools will not. We need to be certain they understand the ideas of the past that drove humankind to kill each other by the millions. We are responsible for teaching our kids to love one another and to respect all nations and people.
I pray to the Lord that the system will change and that the schools will soon see the error of their teachings and better prepare our students to become morally wise, contributing and compassionate members of society not just productive....mbr
The world can be a dusty, dirty place so each day we need to shake off the dust and dirt of this world, face it and give God thanks for another day above the grass. As we face the manure pile life can be sometimes, we need to realize that there is always new life under that pile!
Manure is used to make things grow so as in life, the manure pile that drags us down today, can also bring forth new growth and make us stronger. So we need to stand up, face the day and know that this manure pile we are looking at is only going to make us stronger and bring forth beauty and growth. MBR
Do not be ashamed of fear because it is not a God-given emotion. But the courage and the brave acts that follow when you get over your fear— well that, my friends, is all God-given and a choice you make to let Him help you overcome! mbr
HEADING HOME (For a while!)
Really looking forward to my next mission trip to Newfoundland. My home turf.
As usual, it will be an emotional time for me. Always is when I return home. Every time I go back I face a new/old demon, but I have to do it.
Part of my trip this time will be a visit to Her Majesty’s Penitentiary where, growing up, I spent some time. I still have nightmares about that place.
When I’m back ‘ome I will be speaking at 14 outreach events. Can’t wait. I’m looking forward to spending time with my people. I know the welcome mat is always rolled out for me – gets better every time. I feel the love more and more, and you can’t beat that Newfie pride and the respect people show me for what I am trying to do.
I left a loser and a complete failure many years ago but now I return as a winner thanks to the Good Lord above!